You aren’t going to find an instance that both tolerates hate-speech, and is federated with mostly everyone. That’s not how that works. Sorry, you cannot have your cake, and eat it too.
Federation is a two-way agreement. Instances that do not allow hate-speech will also not probably federate with instances that do allow hate-speech, because of all the hate-speech.
You aren’t going to find an instance that both tolerates hate-speech, and is federated with mostly everyone. That’s not how that works. Sorry, you cannot have your cake, and eat it too.
Federation is a two-way agreement. Instances that do not allow hate-speech will also not probably federate with instances that do allow hate-speech, because of all the hate-speech.